My H.E.A.R.T. Story

 If I close my eyes I can remember. Remember what it used to be like before everything changed. Before I got rescued by thorns and nails. I can take a deep breath and tell myself not to forget. Never forget where you where. I can travel back to that time.... To a time of soul torture and   Sometimes If I dwell to long I can almost taste the pain No desire to wake up Please clock tell me you are deceiving me I am not ready to face this day Five more minutes might be all I get to hide away There has to be more then I am getting... Getting out of bed at the last possible minute Getting Dressed in a coat of Heaviness My legs pulled down with shame A large belt of guilt resting close to my stomach My upper body is clothed with sadness especially right next to my heart Tears are already forming at my eyes but I wipe them because anger is taking over. Its the only way to Survive. Survival-Not sure how I am d...

Recently a Counseling Professor invited students to watch and reflect critically on the movie Inception . This concept of inception is not far off from reality, because people do this to each other all the time (knowingly and unknowingly). We discovered there is a strong connection to the movie and how Therapist can "plant ideas" into clients paths of thinking. In a client/therapist relationship there is a necessary need for the client to trust the therapist which causes a power differential, even if slightly.Many relationships have a power differential and the timing of the ideas being planted matters most. One of the most vulnerable times ideas/values are planted into our minds and patterns of thinking is when we are children. Children assess ideas based on experience. Does mom always respond to my needs? Am I ignored by my parents? Who do they say that I am, good, bad, ugly, pretty, smart, lazy, rebellious? I finally had the time and opportunity to address ...

An old box of letters lay at the bottom of my other boxes... covered in dust almost forgotten. In an attempt to clean things up and throw out the trash of my past I intended to throw them all away, but curiosity got the best of me. I only planned to open one..... Over and over I fished through the sea of colorful envelopes all with the title "Angela" One ready "your the kindest person I know..." another said" Angela what do I do?' "Your words of poetry invokes me" "I am so grateful for you" Whatever happen to that girl? The one that everyone loved to dearly? I let some loved ones slip through my fingers and tears consume me now. How could I have been so blind? Now I have a new identity and I am having to rebuild everything I lost. Sadness would be the primary feeling but I choose to look past that one. I am very grateful for the people that have come into my life. Even if for a short time they have helped shape me. Sha...